Reasons why Men Celebrity don't enjoy love making with their wives

Recently, studies have revealed that most Nigerian men do not enjoy sex with their wives. One out of every 3 marriages struggles with the problem of differing sex drives. And these had led to some of the major break ups in homes these days. Often the loss of sexual pleasure and intimacy results in depression, suspicion, anger, resentment, infidelity and divorce. Although it is clear that this issue is rarely one-sided, it is nevertheless surprising to many that it is often the man who puts the brakes on sexuality and the finger get pointed at the woman. In this report, BOLA AKINBOADE presents some of the reasons most Nigerian men don’t enjoy sex with their wives e as the level of intimacy between them also suddenly becomes cold.

SEXUAL INCOMPATIBILITY

Sexual incompatibility which leads to sexual disharmony and dissatisfaction is the major reason of break up in most marriages. Partners have different attitudes to sex. Your attitude towards sex depends on many factors, the major ones is upbringing and religion. If a girl was taught that sex is something dirty and shameful, than she is very unlikely to feel free and to be open to adventures. Most women refuse oral sex and consider it to be very dirty while men have quite the contrary opinion on this matter. In this situation both partners feel unhappy and sooner or later such a couple starts to experience problems, if unsolved, may lead to cheating or break up. Also if there is a discrepancy in the wife’s reproductive organ, such as tight vagina, this couple are likely to face some problems and this kind of sexual incompatibility can be very rarely resolved. Other factors that may also sexual incompatibility include; differences in the frequencies of sexual desire, different sexual appetite, and others. Most men seem to have a stronger sexual urge than their wives which they find difficult to meet up most of the time.

DIFFERENCES IN SEXUAL DRIVE

For some couples struggling with their relationship, a man may want more sex, while a woman feels their relationship doesn't have enough.
It is hard to expect sexual harmony if the husband wants sex 5 times a week, while the wife thinks that once time is enough. They simply have different sex drives. A woman’s sex drive differs from a man's .A man's sex drive is not so easily turned off. He has been hardwired to think about sex and want sex and, very rarely will a man find himself too tired or too stressed out to have sex. While the woman sex drive diminishes as she has to battle some of the marital issues. There are many things that can easily result in a loss of libido in women. Pregnancy, a hard day at work, the responsibilities of taking care of a home and family, hormonal fluctuation, depression, stress, less help and attention from her husband which was not this bad when they first got married.

LACK OF ADVENTURE

One of the reasons some men give for not enjoying sex with their wives is the fact that she is not sexually adventurous enough. For most couples, the extreme passion and desire of new style of love quickly subsides. During those first few months of lovemaking, everyone's adventurous to varying degrees of personal comfort level, because everyone's really on an adventure. It's all exciting, and it's all new. But in some couple of years, they passion begin to wane and the thrill is gone. Some women suddenly becomes uptight and all the effort by the husband to ignite back the fire seems unproductive.

BOREDOM

Another reason why some men don’t enjoy sex with their wives is boredom. Their sexual life at a point becomes monotonous, same place, same station, same way every time. Men like variety, and when a couple get stuck in a routine, the man is the first one to get dissatisfied with it. What was exciting once upon a time now seems dull. Some men may not be having sex with their wives because sex simply isn't worth the effort. They'd rather watch television.

ANGER

Anger and resentment is another reason some men not only enjoy having sex with their wives.Oftentimes, the anger remains unexpressed. This silent seething has the effect of Novocaine numbing many of the senses, including sexual desire.Many husbands get fed up with a nagging wife at home. And since the wife has become an annoying bully; he shuts down completely and withholds the only thing he thinks might hurt her.

DEPRESSION

Depression is another reason why some men don’t enjoy sex with their wife. Many times, the man may not even be aware that he is depressed over the stressful things in life-economic stress, career stres, not achieving things he wants and others. He is not aware that he has responded to the stress with anger, and the anger has moved into depression. He is not enthusiastic about having sex at all. Compounding the problem, some of the more common antidepressants can cause loss of libido or inability to perform sexually.A report says that antidepressants can have another negative effect on a relationship: it diminishes interest in connecting emotionally with a partner.

SHE GAINS A LOT OF WEIGHT AND BECOMES LESS ATTRACTIVE

Another reason men stop desiring their wives is because they no longer find them physically attractive, or suddenly gained so much weight. Many women do not take care of themselves. They go out of shape and lose out on their figure. At home, they do not take care of their appearances or dress up properly. Naturally, a man becomes fed up with his wife and found her attractive any longer. Men are visual, so excessive weight gain may indeed pose a problem for them. And since Obesity also diminishes libido, an over weight wife may not be as responsive as her partner.

EXTRA- MARITAL AFFAIR

Trying out something new is often a reason given by the husband for indulging in an extra-marital affair. He often feels he needs a change of taste and would like to spend time with someone who is “different” and perhaps “more exciting”. At times, the wife could also be responsible for the situation. A wife paying too much attention to children and household chores often forces a man to go in for relationships outside marriage. He feels neglected. He wants more attention and since he is not getting it at home he prefers to get it from an outsider. And even though he doesn’t have any desire to leave his wife, sometimes the man feel guilty of this act which limits the full expression of his love and desire for his wife. And when he is getting so much fun and varieties from outside, it will be difficult to enjoy the boring and monotonous one from his wife which no longer gets him aroused. 

source: talkofnaija

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Homosexuality is not a psychological disorder

Senior lecturer, Department of Psychology at the Landmark University, Dr. Gboyega Abikoye, has dismissed claims that homosexuality is a psychological disorder, saying there is no consensus among scientists and psychologists on the reasons why individuals develop homosexual orientation.

Citing results of various studies, Abikoye said homosexuality was removed from the list of psychology disorders since 1992 for lack of empirical evidence.

“From a scientific point of view, homosexuality is not a psychological disorder as it is not included in the list of psychological disorders contained in the Diagnostic Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders  and the International Classification of Diseases. These two instruments are the classification instruments used by psychologists, psychiatrists and other mental health professionals in the world.

“The debates regarding the status of homosexuality have received ample empirical attention and no study has found conclusive evidence that homosexuality is a psychological disorder. It was this lack of empirical evidence that prompted the American Psychiatric Association to remove homosexuality from the list of psychological disorders as far back as 1973.

“It appeared that the rest of the world was initially sceptical about the American decision to de-list homosexuality from psychological disorders, so homosexuality remained in the ICD (which is published by World Health Organisation) until 1992 when it was removed from ICD’s list of psychological disorders for want of empirical evidence,” he said.

Abikoye added that the possible factors causing homosexuality in some individuals included genetic, hormonal, developmental, social and cultural influences.

However, the psychologist noted that from all evidence available, homosexuality was a deviation and should be seen more as a social problem than a spiritual or cultural problem.

He said, “The claims that homosexuality is at variance with our culture is inconsistent with facts on ground. The fact is that homosexuality is not a new phenomenon and what we are doing now is merely popularising it. My position on this issue is a social-scientific one.

“As an individual, I am totally against homosexuality. However, as a psychologist I know that there is a huge difference between the ideal and the real, and the ideal of one man is an aberration to another man.”

Abikoye however noted that some studies have found considerably higher incidences of psychological disorders among homosexuals than heterosexuals.

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Husband Got Best Friend Pregnant Would You Forgive Him

Ematai

It is terrible what some men can do because of the inability to control themselves. Maybe, it shouldn’t be called a lack of control, but an intentional act done to spite their wives or the women in their lives.

My ex- husband is a good example of the epitome of lack of control in men. Each time I think of his last escapades, l still wonder if it is possible for Femi not to have known that Amanda, the lady he met abroad is still the same childhood best friend whose photographs he had seen severally in my collections.

Amanda and I did everything together while we were growing up. We went to the same primary school and the same University. We were even posted to the same state during youth service.  We had everything in common except for the men in our lives. In fact, we nearly liked the same men and it showed each time one of us brings home a guy.

Amanda got a visa to Britain, but it didn’t stop our friendship. We couldn’t always talk much because of the expensiveness of international calls, we couldn’t even do mails because Cyber café was just a new development and computers was just finding their way into the country to the very rich.

So as I was getting married, Amanda couldn’t make it to the wedding because she didn’t have a stay at that time and we decided that she shouldn’t come because she might not be able to go back if she dares it. The marriage formality was done and life went to normal with the twins coming and the girl following two years after.

It was exactly five years into my marriage when this seemingly impossible episode took place. My husband had being a playboy, but for some time, he had being acting like a changed man. So l thought all was well with my family.  I thought he had finally settled down to enjoy being a dad to our children and a husband and friend to me.

His company sent him abroad for a six months course and we practically spoke every other day while he was there. He returned back and I got a call from my best friend, she said she was coming to Nigeria for her marriage and l was happy for her, she also said that she was already pregnant for the man in question.

Amanda came to town and rented a place, so most of the times l visit her because Femi returns from the office late and the children stay back at school for their  lessons. I found out her husband to be’s name is also Femi with my Femi’s surname. I was surprised, but saw it as a coincidence; it was on one of my visits to her place that l met her fiancé who happens to be my own …

Hear what our celebrities have to say

No way! – Ematai, Artiste

This is a very difficult one and I do not think I can take it from my husband if l were to be in the wife’s shoes, no matter the amount of begging from him. And as for my friend, it is not her fault because she hasn’t met my husband or seen his photograph.

Ematai

My husband took advantage of an innocent woman by lying that he wasn’t married. I cannot live with any man who could lie that bad to the extent of doing that to somebody who hasn’t offend him before. It only means that this type of husband would one day have a home number two and you the wife wouldn’t know a thing about it until probably he dies.

I would walk away with children and l hope my friend does the same thing too because what he has done to me, he would do it to another.


Forgive him, but with… Chidiebere Aneke, Actress

It would be a tough one for me because the law says ignorance is not an excuse. Why did he cheat on me in the first place? Honestly, I would be devastated, but l will ask God for strength to forgive him and still stay in the marriage.

Ogechi Okafor

I naturally hate divorce and I am sure my own parents must have passed challenges while l was growing up. It is not the problem that is the issue, but how you overcome it. As for my friend, she would keep the pregnancy because there would not be any thought of abortion from my angle. Together we shall see what God has in mind for us at the long run, but as for sharing my husband, l would not ever do that.
Walk away- Ogechi Okafor, Artiste

He is claiming he didn’t recognize my own best friend, but he has being seeing her photographs since he married me. He is also aware that she lives in Britain and yet he claims it is a mistake? What was he planning to do, to have another home somewhere while l live like the fool?

I do not think l married a fool as a husband who would not know the difference between a photograph of five years and the real person of today. I believe my girl friend would love me enough to leave that type of man for good. And as for me, that marriage is over because I would walk away and pick up the pieces of my life without a thought of him.

By Florence Amagiya

Source: Vanguard

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Kate Henshaw Talks About Her Failed Marriage and Why Men Cheat On Their WIves

Popular Nollywood actress Kate Henshaw in this interview talks about her failed marriage, about men roaming around, about being an Onga brand ambassador among others.
Read the full interview below:

    ”Onga it’s a brand that I have grown to love and like I said in some of my previous interviews, I didn’t know anything about the brand until I took up this appointment. Now it’s a brand I love and have convinced a lot of people to try.

    I was just picked. I didn’t compete with any one; the MD just called me and asked me if I could take up the appointment.
    My husband just talked about me; he told them his wife could help boost the brand and they decided to give it a shot.
    I don’t know if he is complaining since it was him who added to my duties. If he is; it’s a pity, because I have come to love it more than anything else.
    I have a feeling that he does… this feeling of you are not always around… and when you are, it’s either you are attending one event or another. I feel it; I sense it. I know it’s tough, but hey, looks like I can’t help it.

    If he wants to be taken; he is a free person. My dear, marriage is not a bondage o. If he decides to roam around, well… in any case, you men always roam.
    The society always blames the woman, but I believe that every woman should be independent; but let me tell you something, if you want a person to stay when the person does not want to stay, there is nothing you can do about it. You can only do your best and leave the rest to God. I believe every woman should be working or doing something instead of just sitting at home. God forbid, if anything happens and you don’t have anything to fall back on, too bad, you will be lost. I have come to a stage now that all I do is to make myself happy and do what I think is right. People will always talk, no matter how good you are.

    What about Omotola (actress Omotola Jalade-Ekeinde)? Her husband is a Nigerian and she is travelling all over the place. She runs an NGO and a music career that puts her on the move… there are so many other people and it doesn’t matter the race; if a man is a good man and he is confident in himself, he will let you be what you want to be. Because that is what completes both of you; that is what makes both of you happy; bringing whatever you have been able to make to the family.
    What about J-Lo (Jennifer Lopez) and Mac Anthony, they have split up. After six years of marriage. I don’t know for whatever reason but you and I know that she is busy and he is busy and I know that she is busier than he is. May be there is an effect there; may be some kind of threat or insecurity. But that’s the fact, when they part ways they are not enemies, each person wishes the other person well and life moves on.

    That’s how marriage and divorce should be. There shouldn’t be any rancour especially when children are involved. I mean, my mum left my dad and hey, it hasn’t affected me… sorry, it did at a point but I have moved on.
    About my daughter, I feel really guilty most of the time for not being around her, but good enough, she seems to understand. And the little time that we spend together, I try to make quality out of it. We talk at length; we go to the cinema and do all sorts together. She does understand that this is the nature of my job. There was a time she came home and asked, mummy are you on twitters? And I said yes, then she said one of her friends in school said she follows me on twitters. And I said oh, that’s embarrassing but you know she is so grown up now and her speech so profound.

    My daughter is lonely…, she is sometimes. Because even her dad is busy; he works and travels and that is what you get when both parents are the busy type. But I try during the holiday season to create a family time by trying to let go what ever trip that is not so compulsory.
    My low moment is such that since I have turned forty, I should try and spend more moments with my daughter really. I think about this a lot and it bothers me. And I intend to effect that change. As she is growing up before you know it, she’s gone to boarding house and I won’t be seeing her as much. Before you know it, she is already 20 and she is going to her husband’s house and I hardly know her… I intend to spend more time with her”.

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Staring at breasts increases heart health.......HOW TRUE?

Guys, listen up. A study says it is actually healthy to stare at a woman's breasts.

Five-hundred men participated in the German study. Half were told to refrain from looking at breasts for five years, the other half were told to ogle them daily.

The study found the men who stared at breasts more often showed lower rates of heart problems, a lower resting heart rate and lower blood pressure.

The authors of the study recommend that men stare at breasts for 10 minutes a day.

NOte: do not stare at your mom and sisters breast ooooo lol




source: talkofnaija.com

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Nigerian Women Are Ranked The Most Unfaithful In The whole World

Malaysians are ranked third in the world for being the most unfaithful partner, reported China Press.

According to a survey, 33 percent of Malaysian men admitted that they were unfaithful to their spouses. Thailand is first at 54 percent while South Korea came in second with 34 percent.

After Malaysia, the countries next on the list were Russia at 32 percent and Hong Kong at 29 percent.

Some 39 percent of Malaysian women also confessed to having betrayed their partners. The top two countries are Nigeria at 62 percent and Thailand at 59 percent.

Russian women are the fourth most unfaithful at 33 percent while Singaporeans are fifth at 19 percent.

The survey, conducted by condom manufacturer Durex, was based on interviews with 29,000 people in 36 countries.

It also revealed that Malaysian men have an average of three sex partners in their lives while those in Singapore and Hong Kong have 16, which is the highest in Asia.

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Ten Golden Rules To Having Safe S*x

It is always smart to talk about s*x with your partner, a peer educator or a healthcare professional before you make the decision to have s*x. While s*xual intercourse always involves some risk of pregnancy or s*xually transmitted disease, there are definitely ways of making your s*xual experiences safer. Here are 10 simple things you can do, say and think about now before you have s*x:

1. Talk smart s*x first. Have smart s*x later. STIs and unintended pregnancies affect both partners, not just one person. If you feel uncomfortable discussing s*x and birth control with your partner, then you shouldn’t be having s*x. Be straightforward and talk about s*x beforehand so both partners know what to expect. It’s easier to be rational and reasonable before you’re in the “heat of the moment.”

2. Don’t feel pressured to have s*x. Or have s*x out of fear – fear of hurting someone’s feelings by saying no or fear of being the “only one” who isn’t doing it. Virtually everyone wants to fit in with his or her friends, but you should never compromise your values to be “part of the crowd.” If you don’t want to have s*x, be honest, discuss the reasons behind your decision with your partner and stay true to you.

3. Don’t abuse alcohol/use drugs if you think things could get physical. Drug use or alcohol abuse interferes with decision-making, which can lead to date rape, forgetting to use contraceptives or contracting an STI. The lowering of inhibitions that often accompanies alcohol use might make you think you’ll enjoy s*x more, but in fact, for a variety of biochemical reasons, too much alcohol actually makes s*x less enjoyable for both men and women.

4. Two are better than one. To help prevent both pregnancy and STIs, you should correctly and consistently use a birth control method like the Pill, contraceptive injection or diaphragm (for pregnancy prevention) and a condom (to prevent STIs). Condom use is essential, especially in relationships that are not monogamous. If your partner says no to contraceptives that may prevent STIs, like condoms, it’s probably time to rethink your relationship. Nothing is worth the potential lifetime consequences of a few minutes of unprotected fun.

5. Use the buddy system. If you go to a party or a bar, go with friends and keep an eye out for each other. Agree that you won’t leave with another person without telling someone. Sometimes a friend’s “second opinion” could help prevent you from making decisions that you might regret later.

6. Remember that “no” means NO and passed out doesn’t mean YES. Being drunk isn’t a defense for committing s*xual assault. If you are too drunk to understand a person trying to say no; if you are too drunk to listen and respect a person saying no; or if you have s*x with somebody who is passed out or incapable of giving consent, it can be considered rape. Click here to read about how men and women can avoid the consequences of date rape.

7. Respect everyone’s right to make his/her own personal decision – including yourself. There is no imaginary “deadline,” no ideal age, no perfect point in a relationship where s*x has to happen. If your partner tells you that he or she is not ready to have s*x, respect his/her decision, be supportive and discuss the reasons behind it. It is everyone’s ultimate right to decide when and how they have s*x – be it the first time or the tenth time.

8. Be prepared for a s*x emergency. Consider carrying two condoms with you just in case one breaks or tears while it’s being put on. Both men and women are equally responsible for preventing STIs, using contraceptives and both should carry condoms. Sometimes things go wrong even when you try to do everything right. Women should also know about emergency contraception or EC. Taken within 72 hours of intercourse, EC may prevent pregnancy.

9. The best protection doesn’t mean less affection. Abstinence is actually the most effective way to protect against STIs and prevent pregnancy. But practicing abstinence doesn’t mean you can’t have an intimate physical relationship with someone – it just means you don’t have vaginal or anal intercourse. There are many other ways to be intimate and not have intercourse – just be aware that alternatives, like oral s*x, carry their own risks.

10. Make s*xual health a priority. Whether you are having s*x or not, both men and women need to have regular check-ups to make sure they are s*xually healthy. Women should have annual gynecological exams.....
   

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60 Things Guys Should Know About Girls

1.) For all we talk about how hot guys are. We mostly care about there personality. Though a hot body is a plus

2) We are just as shy as you are about relationships

3) Many of us don't let you see us cry, unless we want you to comfort us

4) We like dropping small flirts, to see if you are interested. But we will later deny it or make it into a joke

5) Most of us prefer to be call beautiful than hot or sexy. But not all of us

6) We only wear mini skirts, tank tops and skimpy cloths for you (unless it's REALLY REALLY hot outside). So if you don't like what we wear say something likely look really nice today, but you know...I think I like you in jeans better'

7) We travel in groups for one of two reasons 1) because we want to share some form of gossip with each other or get advice on something 2) B/c we don't want to get caught by ourselves with you because we won't know what to say and are afraid we'll make a fool of ourselves

8) Cool MOST girls spend about 15% of the time thinking about specific guys, 20% thinking of guys in general, 25% thinking of how to get guys to notice us and what to say when we do, 30% of the time TALKING about guys (even if someone else isn't listening), and 10% of the time doing something else

9) Girls automatically assume that all guys are ***** and only want to get into our pants until you prove otherwise (and even then some small part of us still thinks that)

10) Most girls are under the impression that guys only want skinny 'hot' girls

11) Most girls enjoy being paraded around once in awhile in front of your friends. We enjoy having you show us off to your friends, kind of like, 'Hey, look at my hot ass girlfriend! Aren't you jealous?" But we don't enjoy being nothing but a trophy girl

12) Nicknames like "Babe, or darling" are safe to call just about any girl. But beware of "Princess or Angel". Some girls will take offense to this thinking you are calling them to innocent or incapable of taking care of themselves.

13) Speaking of nicknames, almost every girl has ONE nickname that they just love to be called

14) Most girls will drop lots of hints to tell you that they like you, but won't come right out and say" I like you" or "I love you". If you think they like you, there is a good chance they do.

15) Scenario time! -You like a girl named Ashley, Ashley has a friend named Brenda. Brenda comes up you in the hall and asks "Do you like Ashley?"

More often than not in this scenario Ashley asked Brenda to ask you because she is to shy to ask you herself. And even if she didn't the first thing Brenda is going to do with your answer is tell Ashley. Now you are thinking "WHAT!? NO!! DON"T TELL HER THAT!!!" but in reality, this is a good thing. Because there is a good chance she already likes you. And if she doesn't, she will now be looking at you in a different way, and let me tell you. It's a lot easier to fall for a guy if you already know they like you. So its safe. So go ahead and tell Brenda that you like Ashley. Take a chance.

16) Girls hate it when guys say perverted things.

17) Girls love to feel special, even though they might not show it

18) Girls talk about everything with their girl friends. So unless you tell us not to tell them about something, they WILL know about it within 3 days. And if you are the girl's boyfriend, that means, you're possibly 90% of their conversation. And believe me, trash talking takes up most of it, unless you're a Greek god, which you're not...

19) Girls hate guys with bad hygiene.

20) Girls love it when a guy pulls them close by the waist

21) Most girls like a guy that will willing dance with them, even if he doesn't know how

22) Usually, when a girl is sarcastically mean to you, it means they're attracted to you, but are afraid that they'll be showing too much

23) A kiss on the hand with the right timing can be a REAL TURN-ON

24) Some girls can think about their crushes for 18+ hours straight. No exaggeration

25) When a guy says something really sentimental, girls will remember it forever

26) Girls get embarrassed easily, even if guys don't know what the hell just happened.

27) Girls daydream about their crushes ALL the time. They just don't show it.

28) When a girl is upset and wants you to listen, she wants you to listen. She doesn't need you to fix it or tell her how to. She just wants you to listen.

29) When a girl is crying, she feels a lot safer if you pull her close and tell her that everything is going to be all right. And more likely than not, it will endear them to you more than anything else.

30) Girls love it when guys say their name

31) Girls love confidence

32) When a girl cooks for you, you know you mean a lot to her

33) Girls hate it when other girls flirt. Yet they flirt themselves too. Ah, the beauty of irony

34) We don't enjoy talking dirty to you as much as you enjoy listening.

35) Saying something sweet might get you off the hook; doing something sweet will always get you off the hook.

36) Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that want relationships.

37) No matter what you say, your ex-girlfriend is a hoe to us. Not because we don't like your taste in women, because believe me WE do! its just that...we don't want to have to wonder if she is better than us. And if she is a hoe, we are better. So it makes things simple for us.

38) We are self-conscious by nature; we can't help it. But we CAN try and hide it.

39) Even if you think it is cool to burp, fart, or emit other strange gases from your body, it is not. Though we sometimes will tell you it is.

40) As far as you are concerned, we are beautiful at all times, and don't tell us different, unless you make it sound like a compliment (even if it isn't) Like, "You were really pretty yesterday when you wore -insert clothing/accessory here-, I think you should wear that more often"

41) Whatever you do, don't just show up at our house unexpected or at least without ringing the door bell...we run around in our underwear just like you do. And no matter how much you would like to see that, we will likely never talk to you again

42) DON'T CHEAT ON US. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be dirt.

43) We want you to beware of every male relative and all guy friends. All of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat. We just don't want you to be too obvious.

44) We enjoy being kissed by you in front of your friends. It makes us feel like you care a lot about us.

45) You don't have PMS; so don't act like you know what it's like. Don't try to understand...believe me you never will.

46) Violent statements like "If that guy keeps looking at you, I'm going to tear his head off" are appealing

47) We don't want you to say you love us if you don't mean it

48) We love it when you make eye contact with us while we talk.

49) Most girls are afraid of losing our independence to guys (for some unknown reason)

50) If you ask a girl out directly, more likely than not, she will say yes to you. Even if she only has lukewarm feelings for you, because it will give her the chance to get to know you better and get to like you even more.

51) Most girls love it when guys ask them for advice.

52) Girls like it when you tell us what you are thinking, even if you don't understand it yourself

53) After you've been dating for a while, realize that we really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond

54) There is nothing wrong with being attentive and sensitive. However, this behavior can be carried too far. You don't have to hang on our every word or give in to our every whim. The thrill of the chase doesn't end after the first successful pick-up line. If you don't present us with some minor challenges, we're likely to get bored, or worse, feel that you're creepy and obsessive.

55) Variety is the spice of life. There are patterns underlying what your woman says she likes and doesn't like. It would benefit you far more to try and discern the nature of these than to repeat everything she admits to enjoying until she no longer does

56) Most men think the chase ends once they have us, but truly it has only just began.You must work even harder to keep us then you do you earn us. We not some trophy you can earn,put on a shelf and admire. You have to care for us like the living human beings we are.(see 54)

57)WHEN WE SAY NO ITS NO, SO STOP ASKING!!!

58)If someone flirts with you, its a complement. If you're not interested, accept it but dont flirt back.

59)The woman in your life needs to hear how you feel about her, and often. Tell her now

60)All women are complicated, and it is doubtful any man will ever fully be able to understand us.But we know that, so its going to be ok...

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Women regularly fake orgasm to stop their men from cheating

According to a new study, 50% of women fake orgasm...and the reason they regularly fake orgasm is to stop their men from cheating.

Regularly pretending to climax is just one strategy women use to ensure their partners stay faithful, according to research produced in New York and Michigan.

We fake orgasm to keep our men faithful? Do you agree with this study? I think we fake it mostly to make the men feel good. After all their 'work', we have to make them believe 'They did well'.

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Mistakes Men Make In Marriage

Men, you often don’t mean to nag, but you may be making mistakes that risk ruining your marriage. In fact, if you are a typical man, you are likely making several mistakes and quite often. Don’t believe me? Ask your wife.

Now, before you get all defensive, this isn’t about blame. These are not ridiculous relationship mistakes; they are the subtle things that you might not even know you’re doing. And changing these habits could make a big difference to your wife and that can only be good for you.
Recognizing these mistakes and making efforts to correct them will not only help your marriage, it may also help your health and that of your spouse.

Over time, negative feelings in a relationships that are not addressed can lead to physical and psychological problems, says Silver Spring.
Now I want to show you some of those things you are doing wrong and which are hurting your wife without you knowing it. As usual, I expect some attacks from the men, but that won’t matter; I am enjoying every bit of it and I love you guys.

Being S*xually Selfish or Clueless

In the bedroom, according to Maslow, men forget or, worse, haven’t figured out that their wives often need more than they do to get turned on.

“Affection, making her feel loved and needed is basic for her to feel aroused,” Maslow says, while Vanderhorst says turning a woman on begins well before the lights go down.

“Men perceive love making as a sufficient means of being close, of having a connection”, she says. But women want a connection prior to love making.

To a typical man, love making is about going in there and coming out before the woman even starts to enjoy it. Like Vanderhorst says, turning a woman on begins before the lights go down. If you must get your wife to desire s*x with you, you must be ready to get her to be happy and excited having you around even before sunset.

A good number of men complain about their wives losing appetite for s*x once they have children. It is not always the case of a woman losing appetite for s*x or having a low libido; it is about you and the man you are. How do you expect a normal human being to get aroused after your shouting and nagging? For a good s*x life with your wife, you must be willing to create a good atmosphere for s*x. I know she can be crazy and often gets on your nerves, but God has given you the ability to treat her as the weaker vessel.

Please create time to ignore your own s*xual satisfaction and give up yourself for her pleasure. Explore her body to find out what her erogenous zones are and how best she wants you to handle them. It is an adventure worth taking for the woman you love.

Losing her friendship

Everyone desires to be with the loved one. The mistake often made by men is their belief that a woman doesn’t really need a man the moment she starts having babies. Men oftentimes ignore their wives believing the company of the children is enough for her. Sir, her marriage is to you and not the children.

A good number of African men end the friendship they have with their wife as soon as their babies come. What you don’t know is that the woman needs you more at that stage of her life. Don’t go the way of other men who dump their wives at home and find pleasure in the company of friends and other women. If you choose to go that way, chances are she won’t be there by the time you start seeking her company and friendship because she must have created friends and other companies to take your place.

From my counseling sessions, I have come to realise that men oftentimes misbehave at the early stage of their marriage only for them to start looking for her friendship at the later part of their lives. This is when you see men complaining of their wives not having their time, but the truth is that she is doing what she is familiar with—living her life without you.

Worshiping the mother

I am one person who does not joke with elderly people. I believe our parents must be properly taken care of, but also believe a woman should be given the respect due to her in her husband’s house.

A good number of men don’t have regard for their wives. Recently, during my trip to Port Harcourt, a man came to me with a complaint about his sister who is in a marriage where the man gives money to his mother to cook not just for her husband, but he, the son. This is about leading to the end of her marriage as the girl’s family is bent on taking her out of that home. Guys, this is very wrong and no woman will be happy to be treated this way. Even your mother, who is happily involved in this, will kick against it if her daughter is treated this way.

The moment you get married to your wife, your mother ceases to have that very place in your heart. Give her all that she wants and make her feel loved, but let her understand that her loving your wife means her loving you. Often times we complain about bad daughters in-law. I have found out that the women in most cases are not really mean, but were pushed to a point that they change negatively.

I am not saying there are no terrible women; there are, but men should stop turning the good women to what they are not. What do you expect when you give money for foodstuffs to your mother instead of your wife? What do you expect her to do when you keep running to your mother to ask for advice before you buy her clothes? The natural way of reacting to your style is for the woman to automatically hate your mother.

Stop hiding things about your family from her because that tells her she is just a stranger in your midst. When you are talking to your mother and the moment your wife comes out you change the topic of discussion, don’t think she doesn’t have an idea of what you are doing; she knows and will do everything to protect her own territory too. Let everyone around you know you are one with your wife.

Conflict Resolution

How do you handle issues in your home? Are you one of those men who get their friends and family involved in every argument? Are you the type that runs out to meet other women who sweet tongue you the moment you fall out with your wife? Are you that man who brings his sisters to come and beat up his wife after a fight? If you fall into any of these groups, I am sorry, but I have to let you know you are yet to become a man.

There is no problem too difficult to a real man. You may not agree with me, but the truth is that no woman is uncontrollable. The only thing that makes her look uncontrollable is the inability of her man to identify the key to her head and heart. No matter her level of madness, there is a man out there who has the key to her sanity and this is why I tell women to always be careful in their choice of a man.

Instead of you raising your hand on a woman or like some men do, carry your chair to exchange words with a woman, bring out the man in you. Words are powerful and can conquer strong nations and kings. Words, sweet words, spoken at the right time when she is calm, can melt that very strong and tough heart.

Market List

It is surprising to know there are still men in this age and time who ask their wives for market list. Some even go the extent of asking their wife to submit her market list to the secretary for screening and approval. If you are such a man, you are a disgrace to nature. Some men won’t even give the woman money to go to the market, they do the shopping themselves all in the name of love. Others follow her to the market all in the name of love, but the truth is that they are monitoring her spending. If she is your wife, stop monitoring her.

I advise women not to make themselves too cheap by lying when it comes to market list, but I also don’t blame them much because when a man keeps her as a full-time housewife and at the same time does not provide for her, the only option left is for her to start looking for ways to get some money for her upkeep. If I may ask, who should spend your money if not your wife?

Before you do anything to your wife, please pause and ask yourself this question, how will I feel if a man does this to my daughter or sister? If your answer is in the negative, please don’t do it to her

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How to Avoid Painful love making

Are you suffering from painful intercourse? If so, you are not alone. Female s*xual pain is rarely discussed in the media, at the coffee shop or even in the doctor's office but it is a real problem for many women and some men.

Dyspareunia (from Greek meaning "badly mated") is painful s*xual intercourse, due to medical or psychological causes. The symptom is reported almost exclusively by women, although the problem can also occur in men. The causes are often reversible, even when long-standing.

Intercourse pain, or Dyspareunia, can cause problems in a couple's s*xual relationship. In addition to the physically pain, there is also the possibility of negative emotional effects where, If you experience pain during s*x, it's almost certain to be distressing for you.

This distress may well make you tighten up and this tightening up will very likely make the pain worse next time. Who loves going back again and again for pains?

So the problem should be addressed as soon as it becomes evident.

What causes it?
There are dozens of possible causes for this type of pain, fortunately, many of them aren't too serious, but a few are.

Ideally, the assessment should be done by a doctor who is skilled in the technique of vaginal examination. One of the first things to be established is: is the pain deep inside you? Or is it near the outside?
This may not be easy to say as sometimes a pain is both superficial (near the outside) and deep. Deciding which it is can help sort out what's wrong.

But in many cases, a woman can experience painful s*x if there is not sufficient vaginal lubrication. When this occurs, the pain can be resolved if the female becomes more relaxed; if the amount of foreplay is increased, or if the couple uses a s*xual lubricant.

In some cases, a woman can experience painful intercourse if one of the following conditions is present:

• Vaginismus. This is a common condition in which there is a spasm in the vaginal muscles, mainly caused by the fear of being hurt. Vaginismus arouses strong emotions, and women who have it are often very angry with their partners, doctors and themselves. But the condition is no one's fault.

Common causes include:

• A restrictive upbringing, in which the woman was brought up to view s*x as nasty or dirty.

• An upbringing in which the woman was given the idea that the vagina is very narrow and so s*x must be very painful.

• A history of rape or childhood s*xual abuse. Experiences like these understandably make women fearful of s*x and of being hurt.

• A medical history of painful vaginal infections.

• Unease with the partner – perhaps at an unconscious level.

It is a common misconception that women with vaginismus dislike s*x altogether. In fact, many women with this condition enjoy closeness with their partners.

Many get great pleasure from love play and some are able to reach orgasm in this way. But the enjoyment ceases when penetration is attempted or suggested.

What are the other causes of deep pain during s*x?

• Vaginal infections: These conditions are common and include yeast infections..

• Problems with the cervix (opening to the uterus): In this case, the penis can reach the cervix at maximum penetration, so problems with the cervix (such as infections) can cause pain during deep penetration..

• Problems with the uterus: These problems may include fibroids that can cause deep intercourse pain..

• Well-endowed partner: Some women complain that their partner’s penis is too big. In fact, when a woman is aroused and relaxed, the vagina extends by several inches – so any female should be able to accommodate any male..

• Endometriosis: A condition in which the endometrium (tissue lining the uterus) grows outside the uterus.

• Problems with the ovaries: Such problems might include cysts on the ovaries.

• Pelvic inflammatory disease: The tissues deep inside become badly inflamed and the pressure of intercourse causes deep pain.

• Ectopic pregnancy: A pregnancy in which a fertilised egg develops outside of the uterus.

• Menopause: The vaginal lining can lose its normal moisture and become dry.

• Intercourse too soon after surgery or childbirth:

• S*xually transmitted diseases: These may include genital warts, herpes sores, or other STDs.

• Injury to the vulva or vagina: These injuries may include a tear from childbirth or from a cut (episiotomy) in the perenium (area of skin between the vagina and the anus) that is made during labor.

Does intercourse pain affect men?

Sometimes men experience pain during intercourse. Common causes are skin disorders on the penis such as eczema or psoriasis.
It can be that the woman's vagina is too tight for her partner. A good s*x lubricant can help here.

Occasional causes of male pain include:

• thrush – in which case the female partner will probably have thrush too

• a forgotten stitch left in the woman's vagina after childbirth

• an IUD thread or a displaced IUD in the vagina

• Peyronie's disease – a male disorder that causes bending of the penis.

How Can It Be Treated?

Some treatments for painful s*x in women do not require medical intervention. For example, in the case of painful  love making after pregnancy, wait at least six weeks after childbirth before attempting intercourse. Make sure to practice gentleness and patience. In cases in which there is vaginal dryness or a lack of lubrication, try water-based lubricants.

Some treatments for female s**ual pain do require a doctor's care. If vaginal dryness is due to menopause, ask a health care professional about estrogen creams or other prescription medications. Other causes of painful intercourse also may require prescription drugs.

For cases of s**ual pain in which there is no underlying medical cause, s*xual therapy might be helpful. Some individuals may need to resolve issues such as guilt, inner conflicts regarding s*x, or feelings regarding a past abuse.

Call a doctor if there are symptoms such as bleeding, genital lesions, irregular periods, vaginal discharge, or involuntary vaginal muscle contractions and ask for a referral to a certified s*x counselor if there are other concerns that need to be addressed.

Summing up Whether you're female or male, you shouldn't disregard pain occurring during intercourse. If it happens more than once, it's time to see an experienced doctor. Very often, the problem is curable.

Avoid ongoing s*xual pain and discomfort that could be destructive to your relationship and to a woman's sense of wholeness.
Seeking help for s**ual pain is just as important to a woman's health and well-being as getting help for a tooth-ache or broken leg.

The pain and discomfort are real and often worsen without treatment.
So before it destroys you, your partner and eventually your marriage. Find a solution now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Man kills Girlfriend After Having Sex With Her in Delta State

A 28-year-old man, Emmanuel Yesin, has been arrested by the police for allegedly shooting his girlfriend to death in Delta State.

Detained alongside Yesin was a friend, whose identity could not be ascertained at the time of filing this report, for covering up the alleged murder.

Nigerian Tribune gathered that the girl, simply identified as Uloma, had visited her boyfriend’s house on Monday last week, and after they had sex, decided to tidy the bed, only to discover a gun hidden by the side of the wall.

She was said to have raised the alarm upon the discovery, a development that drew Yesin’s attention.

A source said Yesin, due to the discovery by the girl,  went for the gun and threatened to kill her.

It was learnt that when the girl continued shouting, the suspect allegedly shot her in the stomach, with the bullet ripping  her intestines.

The suspect’s friend, who was said to be washing clothes outside the house, allegedly rushed inside, only to discover the girl, still in her underwear, gasping for breath and eventually gave up the ghost.

Nigerian Tribune gathered that the suspect’s friend was arrested by the Okere youth, along with Yesin, for allegedly calling a relation of the deceased and reported that robbers struck in their house and snuffed life out of the girl.

The community youths arrested the two suspects and kept them in their custody before inviting the police to take over the suspects.

The state Police Public Relations Officer (PPRO), Charles Muka confirmed the incident and assured that the suspects would soon be charged to court after thorough investigations.

SOURCE: Nigerian Tribune , Talk of Naija
                

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Hot: To Cohabit or Not

The ringing of my phone jolted me out of my reverie as I sat at my desk staring blankly at the computer. I looked at the phone screen. It was Jess, one of my best friends.

“Hiya.” I tried to sound upbeat but it didn’t work.

“Hey guess what?” she chirped.

“What?” I asked feigning interest.

“Mike has asked me to move in with him!”

My first thought was, “And how’s that news?” But I knew better so I bit my tongue and said, “Oh wow really?”

“Yes really.” She drew out the ‘really’ and I could tell she was truly excited.

Jess and Mike got engaged a few weeks ago and Jess has been the happiest girl since then. They had dated for five years and when Mike finally proposed most of us were not surprised, but Jess being a good sport still managed to feign the mother of all surprised looks by nearly passing out when she saw the ring.

Just out of the corner of my eye, I could see my boss coming towards me so I had to tell Jess we would talk more over lunch. As soon my watch hit 1 o’clock, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the office. I half-walked and half-ran to our favourite Aroma cafe which was just a few blocks away. Jess was already there.

“Hey!” she yelled in her usual cheery voice as she waved me over to where she sat.

We hugged as we exchanged pleasantries. Jess knowing me so well had ordered for me. Our food arrived and before I could get a fork of salad into my mouth, Jess blurted, “Should I do it?”

“Do what?”

“Move in with Mike?”

“Hmmm, good question?” I chewed thoughtfully on my food trying to buy time wondering what answer I was supposed to give. “Well, do you want to?” I asked.

“I do. I really do!” she nodded eagerly .

“Well, I guess you’ve answered your own question then.”

“But what do you think? What would you do if you were in my shoes?”

“Honestly? I wouldn’t even think about it. I’ll just do it!”

At first, she thought I was serious until she saw the look on my face and we both burst out laughing. “But seriously, I continued, “think about it carefully before giving him an answer. For me, moving in with my boyfriend or fiancé is a big no–no with my folks so I won’t really have a say in the matter.”

“Yeah I know. But I’ve really thought about it and I think I’d give it a go. I know my parents wouldn’t mind.” Jess’s parents never minded anything. In their books, you are the captain of your own ship and you choose which direction you wish to sail.

“But do you think that’s a good idea? Considering you guys are going to get married and live together for the rest of your lives anyway. Don’t you want to enjoy having your own space before then?”

“Exactly! That‘s why I want to move in with him so I have a picture of what I’ll be dealing with when we get married. Besides, my space is getting rather boring.” She giggled.

I could see where she was coming from. I once had a boyfriend who practically begged me to move in with him, but I refused even though we spent more time at each other’s flat than we did in our individual flats. He thought it was practical and more economical. His reasoning was why should we pay two rents when we can pay one jointly? Why come and leave when you can always be the first person I see in the morning and the last person I see at night? But I couldn’t for a number of reasons. One, what if the relationship didn’t work out? Secondly, what if he never got around to proposing because he had gotten so comfortable with our arrangement that he felt marriage would ruin it. Also, I’m a quite a traditional girl at heart and I believe some things should be done the right way and at the right time. Needless to say that relationship didn’t work out. Even though I know other factors led to the break-up, I still feel the moving in together was a deal breaker for my ex. Or maybe, it simply wasn’t meant to be.

So, single ladies what do you say, would you move in with him or not? And for the married ladies, do you sometimes wish you lived together before marriage?

Let’s discuss!

Credit: http://kreyolnetwork.com

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JACKIE APPIAH GHANIAN STAR ACTRESS IN SEX SCANDAL

News broke that Ghanaian star actress Jackie Appiah is in a sizzling romance with Ace Radio Presenter Abeiku Santa following a sex role she played with him in an upcoming movie titled ‘Death After Birth’.

In the said movie, Abeiku Santana was seen busily ‘banging’ his waist behind Jackie Appiah and groaning, “Wow aaoo! Give it to me… I hear you are good, wow.”

Jackie finally clears the air on Wednesday; she told an online magazine that she did not have sex with Abeiku Santana as it was being speculated.

“Nothing happened. It was a make believe. We tried our best to make it believable. He is a professional and an interesting person. It was good experience acting with him. But nothing happened,”

SOURCE: NIGERIAFILMS

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Ride or Die chick | Naija4Lyfe

As a typical “Naija Boy”(young Nigerian Male) always trying to hunt for adventures and excitement, I decided to take a stroll on this fateful afternoon out of boredom, plus the added fact that I couldn’t stand watching Jerry Springer with my Old-Man since he was off work, and I was back home from school for summer vacation. “As I dey flex dey waka-bout town,” (As I was walking around the neighborhood), “na ehin I jam dis Sisi wit her paddy dem,” (I came across the beautiful young lady with her comrades), {ok I quit the Pidgin English}…at a nearby mall. Something about her was spectacular, and her presence took off-guard, almost knocking me out of my feet. Shawty was fineeeeeee! I automatically had love, lust or perhaps infatuation at first sight (Cupid wasn’t around to distinguish the difference). So many pickup lines started flowing through my medulla oblongata, but had no testicles to move an inch closer to her proximity to say just the simplest hello. My liver failed me yet again. I was sweating, upset, freaking-out, and assuming myself a loser even without making an attempt. Mehn, your boy was a coward.

While I was wondering and gazing at the invisible stars needing just a clue or hint on what next to do, one of the many wise sayings of my father that often come to my rescue in dire situations once again came to my rescue. My father always instructed me on following my intentions, and by all means necessary learn to express myself assertively. He usually stresses that “a try won’t hurt,” and in the worst case scenario you might just be rejected, but that doesn’t make you a failure. All of a sudden I summoned courage, and carefully approached the circle of friends. I asked if they were familiar with the area, and knew of “123 Jonzing Street,” which hypothetically happened to be my parents address lol, but of course they said no.  Full of disappointment like indeed expecting a legitimate answer, I swiftly stepped my game up a notch and tried initiating a lame conversation. I remembered how my Mom would blush the whole day whenever my Dad showered her with praises and told her how beautiful she is, so I thought to myself it won’t hurt to apply the same scheme. You guys look so gorgeous, I said, and not to much of a surprise, they had this glowing bright smile on their faces (while thinking “GOT YOU!”). The conversation sprung a little yonder, while giving the targeted chick more attention. She gave me few accolades, commending my mannerism, and at this point, there was no stopping me. We exchanged phone numbers and Facebook id’s, and cheerfully dispersed for the evening. I couldn’t be any happier at that moment. I raced straight to the closest ATM to ensure enough funds in my account because the next plan was to invite her on a date. We got together few days later, and the rest is history. “You know your boy don’t dull.

History since then is 4+years now. 4 years of an interesting, blissful relationship. Her existence in my life has been one of the best things that ever happened to me. As a very appreciative individual, I decided to finally introduce this blessing to the whole world, and give her the appropriate adoration due. She has been my backbone, and supported me through thick and thin. She never for once forsook me during my trials and tribulations. She wipes away my tears like the “Wiper” of my car, and brightens my world.

She’s indeed God’s very own “engineer” and more like the blueprint to my destiny. So many times have I tried going astray, but she “Steers” me right back into the right direction. She also never hesitates to put me in a complete “Halt” when I fumble; her no-nonsense attitude is something you have no choice but respect. She takes me for whom I am, and sees my vision clearly more than I can ever envision. There’s nothing as enticing and appealing as a strong willed, self focused woman; someone like a “Japanese” gymnast in the Olympics. Her tenacity is close too none. During my youthful exuberant years, when I act silly and nonchalant, she puts my behind right in “Check.” When we have our intellectual talks, her “Head & Eyes” yields so much light capable of leading a path in the dark. Speaking of head, man I tell you, her head game is bananas. Shawty goes hard, you will think she graduated from Cambridge University, but she was raised in the streets…

My chick is so welcoming and down to earth. She has a ritual of inviting friends and/or family members over in the company of 5 (reason yet known to me), and selflessly entertains them. Ma can definitely throw down in the kitchen. She never messes with her domestic cores too, and gets slightly irritated when she finds dirt on her “Leather Couch.” She impresses me so much that I try my possible best to “Gas” her up as much as possible. When we do our grown folks stuff in the middle of the night, its always like two elephants fighting. Our bed suffers a lot I tell, but thank goodness her hips are like the “Suspensions” of a brand new car. She knows how to hold me down tight, and gives me that motivation as described by Kelly Rowland. She’s the best I have ever had, if you know what I mean…

Swag is a word I despise and annoys the crap out of me, but she’s the epitome of that word and much more. We compliment each other well like Jigga & Bey or Barack & Michelle. The funny thing is, she got just “2 pairs of shoes,” unlike other females with shoes addiction, but she manages hers very well through all four seasons. Like every other relationships, we have our conflicting times, which happens at least “once in three months,” but when I take her for a little spa treatment which in return rejuvenates her body and soul, she returns to her happy self.

Because of her class and elegancy, I took the chance to take her out of the country once to pay a visit to my friends in Canada, and mehn she represented well. My friends couldn’t stop singing her praises. That has been one of the most gracious “Trips” I have taken in my life. She’s always readily available to go that extra “Mile” with and for me, sacrificing her time, resources and energy without complaints.

She has been a target and victim of hate, envy, and discrimination, but she still stands firm and keeps her head up high through the “Accidents.” A lot of crooks tried “Stealing” her away from me, but she realizes no one will ever love her like I do. She’s my ultimate love “Machine,” and my “Ride or Die Chick.”

I love my baby, that’s my baby, and I will treat my baby right, hold my baby tight. She is my “Baby Girl!” That’s my “2000 Honda Accord!” Thanks for riding with me! lol

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Fake Organsm | Naija4Lyfe

Back in Nigeria, I attended a western state university but left in my final year due to the never-ending and annoying strikes. But before I left, in my first year ( 17 years old),  I met this girl who i became best friends with. She was nice, beautiful and smart. But she had a major  love for lying. Don’t we all? Well, I do lie but not anywhere close to my friend’s. She lies about food, okada, rat, Obama, grades, Foreign trips, airplane, pastor, everything ,you name it. But lying about her virginity was what destroyed our relationship.

Back to the main story, after we became good friends, we both discovered we were virgins and we promised each other to keep our virginity until we got married. We became backbones and mentored each other about the joy of keeping our virginities. Time went by and in my 300Level I did it, yes, I did it. I had sex with my boyfriend of 3 years. I felt remorseful about it. I cried profusely for breaking God’s promise and my promise to my best friend. I summed up courage and went to tell my friend that our deal was broken. My friend was mad at me and did not talk to me for a month. Finally, we got back together and she would occasionally make fun of me and tell me how much she loves being a virgin unlike some people. My friend would tell anyone who cares to listen that she is a virgin. She boasted about it to all and sundry. I wondered why she had to announce it to the world. Who cares. I once told her ” Aint no point announcing ur sexual status, no one cares if you are or not, its not our business.”

One day, she told me she wanted to break up her 3-year old relationship because her guy kept forcing her to have sex and she thinks the best thing is to break up with him. I tried to persuade her to keep the relationship and talk things over  with the guy but she was adamant on leaving the relationship. Few days later, her boyfriend (Kunle) walked up to me and was crying, he asked me to beg my friend not to leave him. I told him I would, only if he promises  not to force my friend to have sex. Kunle gave me this funny look and said the reason they are breaking up is because my friend said he was not satisfying her sexually enough and she found another guy to satisfy her.

I was shocked, I tried to convince Kunle that my friend was a virgin so that was not possible. Kunle told me that my friend had been having sex since her high school days and they both had sex for 3 years. I was shocked, I could not believe it. My best friend lied to me all this years? I decided not to tell my friend hoping she would tell me, but she did not. 3 months went by, she said nothing. One day, she started bragging to me about her being a virgin and i just watched with my mouth agape. I decided to let her know that I knew the truth. She begged me not to tell anyone and blamed it on the devil.

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Female Orgasm | Naija4Lyfe

First I’d have to start by defining “Making Love” love making is an art, the lady is the canvas and the man the painter. If painted properly with care, you end up with a master piece that can last as long as the Monalisa” I’m so tired of hearing inexperienced guys come in the bar or wherever and brag about how they made her want more only to overhear the story and I just feel sorry for the girl. Guys I’m not saying you not giving your girl what she needs or how she wants it, I’m just going to say the truth and if you feel its directed to you then just learn from what I’d explain here. It is said that 85 percent of African women go through their lives and die without having an orgasm just because most African men would skip foreplay and oral sex to just sex.

Now I got the guys thinking and some cocky guys saying hell no I get her to cum all the time. Okay I have heard so many guys brag and say I did it so fast, she was moaning and came, she told me she came too and I saw so much wet stuff there. Huh? Is that your definition? Then I’m really really sorry she doesn’t want to hurt your ego. When a woman gets to have an Orgasm you will know if you are experienced, it is the dumbest thing to ask you girl “baby did you cum”? As her man you have to know when she did and how to get her there. Just because a girl is really wet don’t mean she just came, it means she is aroused and wants you, guys don’t think that you stick a finger or two for 15 seconds pinch her nipples for 9 seconds suck on her breast 6 seconds and the penetrate her will make her have an orgasm. That’s just being plain selfish and uncaring.

A woman’s orgasm is different from we guys who could afford to burst a nut just by watching porn, a woman’s orgasm has to be built up to the point she can’t take it no more and explodes with pleasure. For the nerds a lady’s orgasm is like charging a dead phone to the point its full. Now I know some guys reading will say what the hell is he feeling like.

Okay guys if your girl just had an orgasm she would not have the strength to stand up and dress up 15 seconds after you think she just came and say “I’m going home”.

When a woman gets and orgasm, her heart rate, blood pressure and breathing increase. Tension builds within her pelvis, muscles contract throughout her body especially in the vagina which is accompanied with series of contractions. Contractions also occur in the uterus, rectum and pelvic floor.

Occasional speaking in tongues you never heard,
Grabbing of your sheets, Toe curling up like she about to have mad cramps
Scratches on your back,
Love marks from her biting your arm because she doesn’t want to scream out loud.
She ends up having a good sleep afterwards.

Now the good guys who care about their woman are ready to ask me, hey how do we achieve all these? It’s simple son. Good communication in the bed room with your woman will help you a lot; don’t assume that screwing your finger in her or finger banging her here and there like you are searching for coins in her is fun to her. Ask her how she wants her body touched, ask her how hard she wants her nipples bitten and sucked, licked or pinched because its different strokes for different folks after all, ask her how to play with her clitoris and how she wants it licked, nibbled, eaten etc when you go down on her. Don’t just assume. A woman’s body differs from the long shaft in your boxers.

For all those guys that just skip foreplay and head to sex, I’m really sorry for you because when she comes in contact to the real deal, you would be an ex soon. 75 percent of women say they achieve orgasm via oral sex almost every time it is done well. Dudes don’t be selfish and expect her to give you a blow job when you not ready to down and eat the hell out of her pum pum and even when you do, you just go down and give it 5 licks and you are up. 5 licks!!!??? Come on son, spend some quality time down there and give her the best oral sex she ever had, occasionally look up and watch her flap her legs around like butterflies and see the gyration of her waste from so much pleasure, then when she gets an orgasm you can have a personal experience of what a vagina does when she has an orgasm because I am not going tell you that.

Also put a little swag in your sex life. Make it so nice she wants to be by your place tomorrow. Guys always have a romantic atmosphere, a good flow of natural lubrication so that the delicate female parts don’t get sore, and always never forget to stimulate her clitoris no matter what you doing. Please bear in mind and forget whatever you guys think or how big you think you packing. Sexual intercourse by itself is not likely to produce an orgasm. This is because intercourse alone is not very good at stimulating the woman’s clitoris and nearly all females need additional stimulation of the clitoris by fingers or mouth.

So even if you are having sexual intercourse with your woman, reach out and stimulate her clitoris and your other should get busy on her breast or grabbing some of those her lovely curves. Don’t just ignore her body work with every part that is exposed.

Remember these:

Don’t be in a rush because it’s a turn on for women if they see you know what you are doing

Don’t be too demanding – Love making is not an Olympic event

Always ask her what she wants but please don’t bore her out with questions. Just shut up and drive

Give her lots of kisses and cuddles before you make an approach to her sexual area

Take things gently and see what she wants


Always remember that stimulation of the clitoris is the key to female orgasm weather by mouth or stroking it with your finger. So guys pop in some Marvin Gaye set the mode right and stop starving your woman an Orgasm.

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